I have been blocked for quite awhile. Funny things have happened since my last blog post and some horrible and some uplifting but I have not had the desire to blog. Until today.
Two nights ago I went out with a guy I met. He was asking me what I do creativity. I don’t do music or drawing or painting but I do write. I told him I have a blog going but I haven’t wrote in awhile. I realize I should write everyday but I sit here and stare at the empty screen and NOTHING comes to mind. Except of course, during my night classes. I write for pages on and on about stuff. I think that may be my secret way of not having my head hit the desk from sheer exhaustion by that point.
Today, I get to school early so I can get my math out of the way to meet Marci at 4:30 since she will be in Costa Mesa today. Duhhhh… I forgot that the math lab does not open until 12:30. So getting here an hour and a half early didn’t really benefit me in any way. I am sitting in the cafeteria attempting to muddle my way through the first chapter of math. I have a self set test today and if I keep on my schedule I will knock out all my math (required to transfer) by next March.
Here I sit… staring out the window, watching the overly stuffed cafeteria full of people. Some guys go by and flat out ignore the table next to me. Other people walk the long way so not to pass the table. Others glance at them and then look away. Not one person smiled at these people. I felt bad for them. I smile at everyone so naturally I smiled at them and a few of these people smiled back. One girl at the table had difficulty eating and the man whom I smiled at leaned over and so gently wiped her face since she had peanut butter on it (I know it was peanut butter because another dude at the table asked what she was having for lunch and the caretaker responded with a “peanut butter and jelly sandwich”). I realized (and I know I should already know this but occasionally I do need to be reminded) that my “problems” that arise in my life are so trivial compared to some other people. Yet these people who seem to have many problems (for one, to be strapped into a chair and fed a sandwich) still offer a friendly smile or a delicate loving touch to someone they care about or see they need help.
I like to be reminded that there are people in this world who are not self absorbed energy vampires.