It’s quite entertaining when someone gives me so much power. Take the old insecure bitch. She is giving me a stupid amount of power by most likely reading this (yeah you!!) and emailing me and all sorts of dumb shit insecure broads do. I would expect her behavior from a adolescent girl. Not her age. I thought people mature and have wisdom when they grow old? Not all reach the age of maturity apparently. Emailing me, has got to be the most insecure, jealous, psychotic thing to do. And yes, i have emailed the other woman before and I realize how crazy it is. i was tired Of being strung along and loved him to the point of craziness. I learned my lesson though. With Jeff, even when i didn’t trust a bone in his body, after checking his phone that one time, I never checked it. I never checked it because i didn’t want to find anything else AND if i was to trust him i had to blindly believe him. How could we build the trust if i was breathing down his neck and being crazy? It would prompt him to be better at hiding shit. i read Cosmo! Well, i used to anyway. She is spouting off about trust but if she’s checking and being crazy, that’s not trust or love. Pretending to be him and demanding passwords are signs of a person who has trust issues. Claiming you love someone “so much” but spending all your time checking up on them through email and writing emails to other people… Just gotta say… Grow the fuck up. Is it that hard to just ignore the email? I suppose only secure people can do that. Thank god I’m in Texas and she’s in California because I would hate to share a city with her. She has already proven herself psycho numerous times. I can see her staring on her own episode of women behind bars or snapped. she just doesn’t have small children she can drown. That’s another thing. Hahaha, she is jealous over someone who lives 1500 miles away. Whatever.

Now that I got that off my chest, I met a guy tonight. Totally caught me off guard because I did not think I would have a date a week from now. He’s older, has a great job, divorced … And a Grampa!!!!!! hahahahaha!! All that teasing I did to Jeff about dating a Grama and I meet a Grampa. We hung out for a few hours. He is 6’4. We tested out the height because I was flat footed today and its pretty awesome. I love tall guys. So I can totally wear heels. We chuckled about dating younger and the awkward non conversations we have. no one could shut us up. We discussed his divorce and kids, his parents, my almost marriage, alot about my job, had to explain the wedding ring I wear (gives me a great excuse of why I’m not able to go on dates), covered his job, food we like, music, places to go, talked about the traveling we have done… Just everything under the sun (moon?). Laid down the ground rules right off the bat. He knows where I work and won’t tell me to quit my job in a month (if we work out) (not that I would just because a guy has insecurities) and there was more but I forgot now. I have a hangover right now and it sucks. it’s 4am … Who gets hangovers the same day they drink? I didn’t even drink that much and I watched my drink… Oh fuck I did leave it at the bar but I’m going to just trust that no one drugged my drink. I remember the whole night so I don’t think that happened. I’m just not used to drinking.
Well any way, he’s taking me out for Indian food. I guess there is a good restaurant around here. He works for an airline as a mechanic and was telling me about how he flies for free. Made me think… Perhaps I should find a job at an airline and then I can start flying for cheap or free. Finally make it back to England and all the other places I want to go. Surprisingly he has never been overseas. His kids are grown (with kids) so he has the free time to travel. minus his job of course. I’m go an be stoked when I’m older and have the job and money to back my desire to travel. Or if I can pull my shit together in the next year.

After chattering our heads off, he walked me to the car and kissed me good night! It was so strange not to be pawed at. Made me that more intrigued. He wasn’t too sure of my door handle but he drives a Lexus so i figure he can pick me up on our date.

Well, I have a horrible headache and I should go to sleep after I pound another few water bottles. I have work and.. The past few days were not too bad. I pissed off a dancer, made friends with a couple, and that’s about it. There was more but I have forgot it. There is so much material that place provides.

Sorry for any weirdness on this post. I’m doing it (ha) from my phone so… We all know how that works out!!


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